#110 - Your Audience Didn’t Ignore You; They Just Didn’t Hear You Yet

We share a clear, kinder way to do marketing: repeat your message with integrity so the right people can finally hear it. From the mere exposure effect to mini campaigns across platforms, we turn silence into timing and boredom into a positive signal.

• owning the creative life and business coach identity
• why one-off posts fail to reach people
• the wedding metaphor for attention and delivery
• silence meaning timing, not disinterest
• mere exposure effect and the rule of seven
• the boredom paradox and staying the course
• building mini campaigns with varied formats
• using multiple platforms without copy-paste
• checking numbers to calm your nerves
• connecting the dots with clear calls to action

Email me at info at ja-wol.com
Go to www.patternshift.fm to find out more

 You know me as a guide, mentor and teacher, but I've also set off on a new adventure, coaching. Coaching gets a bad rep sometimes, but when it's done right, it can be really transformational. As part of my coaching education, I'll soon need to do real coaching sessions. And it could be a really great opportunity for you to experience it at no or low cost. If you've ever been curious about working with me in this way, now's the time. Just send me an email: info@ja-wol.com

Transcript

New Season And Role Update

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hey and welcome to Patent Shift. I'm Saskia, creative life and business coach for fiber-loving makers, teachers, designers, shop owners, and all-around creatives. I help you wayfind your next step, organize your business to fit your life, and launch ideas with joyful action. Together we'll untangle the tricky bits like branding, marketing and sales, and build something sustainable, soulful, and truly you. Hi, how have you been? It's been a while. I just kind of took January off as well. Because, as I probably told you in the last episode, January doesn't really count, does it? Like you really need this month to get over December. And February is when it all starts again, and when the year really takes off. So here I am with the next season of Patent Shift and telling you all about life and business and balancing all the things. And I have to tell you something. I am now almost, almost officially, like still like tiny bits of things to do, tiny bits of things. A wayfinder life coach. That's the official name. I have kind of rebranded that into I am a creative life and business coach because wayfinding, wayfinding coaching is the latest education I took, but I have a lot more experience and different, I was gonna say alleys and valleys, and I don't know where that was gonna be where my mind was going, but I was going, I think in valleys and mountains, that's where I was going. I have different experiences across the land, and so everything comes together when I call myself a creative life and business coach. So that is what I do. Not only what I do, it's also who I am, because it really feels like this is this is it. I mean, I've always been following my, as we call that, body compass, my essential self. I've always listened to that, but I'm kind of flexing that muscle extra now that I've learned more about it as an actual tool from actual experts. And I was uh an experience expert. Is that even English? I had the expertise of my own experience, and now I feel like this is I'm kind of landing um in this space of being a creative life and business coach. And I'm seriously considering when I make business cards to like cross out the word coach, not explaining anything else, because I love coaching. I love what it does for me, I love what it does for other people, I really love it. I would like to say that coaching has helped me in certain spaces, certain topics in my life has helped me more than therapy ever could because it's a different thing and it's just really good for different things. And I love it so much that I really don't like the word. But I kind of promised myself not to talk about that anymore and just own it. But I feel like that's complex sometimes. That is, it's really hard, and I need to repeat this to myself in order to start really embodying and feeling and owning my shit. Coincidentally, repeating a message is what we're going to talk about today. Um, recently I was hanging out with my business circle people, and we were having a good time, and I was I thought about fun uh exercises for them to do while we also did our wins and woes session, which is where we share our wins and our woes, and we learn as a group collectively and we share our experiences, and it's um I really love it. One of the things that we did was talk about messaging and uh sending out messages to our audience, clients, prospects, uh whatever you want to call the people that are uh in your bubble, in your sphere, the people that are focusing towards you and your business. And if you are telling them things just once, then that's not good. And I'm gonna tell you why. So while I was in this wins and woes session and we were talking about this, a bunch of my clients were talking about feeling very icky repeating a message. They felt like if we have said this, then we've said it and we're moving on. And I was quite shocked when I asked, Well, how many times do you actually repeat a message? And I was quite shocked because some of them said once, and that kind of stuck with me. I felt like I have not been repeating my messages enough when they're saying that. So, yeah, that's what we're gonna talk about today. So, what's happening is when I dove a little bit deeper on that topic, what was happening was they were telling me that they felt like we've posted it, but nobody's reacting. So that must mean that it's not interesting, um, or I'm not good at this, or people not they must just not like what I'm offering or want it, and I better stop talking about it before I get annoying. And that's kind of a spiral, isn't it? If you if you really go through that, it's like nobody's reacting, so I must be annoying, so I better shut up, which is not at all what's happening. So just going to say something about marketing. I know, I know you don't want to, but promise me, I'll hold your hand, you'll be fine. Here's the thing: if you post something once, that's not marketing. It's like you're in a crowded room, let's say you're at a wedding, and you shout this thing, like, or not even shout. No, wait, wait, wait. You're just saying, let's all move to the dance floor, and nobody's moving to the dance floor. Why do you think that is? Could be several things, but your thinking is they just don't want to dance, or they're shy, or could be all kinds of things. They have their stomach is still full, they need to rest before they start dancing. But what is probably the case is that only three people around you heard you, and they might have been doing something else, they might have been talking to the other person next to them, they might have been contemplating, should I get another drink or should I go talk to the bride? And that means that probably only one person heard you, and that was the most shy person or introverted person at the wedding. So if you say, let's all get to the dance floor, and this is what happens, then nobody's going to the dance floor. And it's not because you didn't communicate the right topic or thing, it's just that people didn't hear you. So you have to shout or at least raise your voice a little bit or grab a mic. That could be a really good idea. Grab a mic. And then you walk around the room if you don't have a microphone, and you repeat the message. And around the room, the message will land with some people that really feel like dancing, people that might not be so introverted, or there might be an introverted person next to somebody who's like a really outgoing extrovert, and they will help you spread the message, and they will say, Hey, let's let's go to the dance floor. This is a really good song. You want to go? Um, and so okay, I'm taking this metaphor maybe a little bit too far, but it works for me. I see it, I see it happening, and the thing is, you need to either shout really loudly or preferably repeat the question, repeat the message. So don't draw huge conclusions about the fact that nobody's reacting. It could be all kinds of things, and we'll get into that later. So, with one message, one moment, you accomplish almost nothing, and the research actually agrees on this. So I uh did some research online, and let me just go and see my notes. That's the thing. When I also record these podcasts for YouTube, I sometimes have to look at my notes. And if you're listening on a podcast platform, you don't see me peeking there, but I really have to do that because I my brain cannot like hold it all in. Um, so in marketing and psychology, uh there's something that's called the mere exposure effect. It shows that people tend to recognize, remember, and even like things more when they encounter them repeatedly. Um I I've always thought that must have been the case when it comes to ug boots, ug, ugz, ugz. Uh, must be the repetition, must be like you see it all over the place. At a certain point, even people that you respect their style are starting to wear them. I mean, you can totally tell my age when I'm still I still have still having a kind of a hang-up thing on this thing. And at some point, they just become like a basic. What the hell? How did the ugbud become a basic? Other than the fact that they're probably so warm and comfortable. Anyway, this is my point. So, in other words, uh seeing something once rarely does much at all. Um, classic marketing also reflects this. So they talk about the rule of seven. It's the idea that people often need to encounter a message around seven times before it actually starts to register. So that's only registering it. That's only just noticing that it's there. And it's not because those people are slow, it's because they're human. And most people don't see everything you post, even though you're the best, you're the greatest, you're the most wonderful person alive. Your pictures are wonderful, your stories are wonderful. They don't see everything you post. It's all the way that works. And I I I really don't need to, I I guess I do. I need to explain that to you. I need to repeat that to you because that's what I noticed when I was talking to my lovely peeps at the business circle. I need to repeat that the algorithm, the way social media and other spaces and places online, even your newsletter, the way that is built in our lives, it means that you don't see every message. I mean, do you read all your emails? No, you don't. There's a lot of numbers and a lot of proof that emails get read much more than social media posts. So if you want to have an idea of what that means for you, you can go to your email provider, your email service provider, and look at your numbers and see what your open rate is, and then realize that your social media open rate is much, much lower. So just slightly hold that in your hand, the idea of looking at the numbers that give you actual information. I know that's annoying, but I mean, yeah, numbers. Even I, I mean, I'm about letters, I'm not about numbers. Um, and even I realize that this is good information, and information is power. Um, yeah, that doesn't really ring for me. Information is knowledge, and knowledge is great because with knowledge you can help other people. That's much better. Um, so yeah, they don't see everything you post. They might scroll at the wrong moment when it's just not appearing. They could be distracted, like they might notice it. It's like, hey, there's a whoo, that's the most wonderful person on earth, and then they get distracted, or they're tired, or they think, oh, that's nice, and they keep going. All of these things are true. And if you don't believe it, try to look at how you consume social media, messages, email messages, other platforms, when you're at a fair, when you're walking around a festival, a market, when you're walking around, try to notice what you're noticing, if that makes sense. Like it's super meta. Um, so what you need to fully believe now and feel, and take a moment, sit down, focus, is that silence does not mean disinterest. Like, don't make it personal. I know you're doing that, and I actually have this wonderful piece of art here in my studio that says, do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life, and the never work a day in your life is crossed out, and instead it says, do what you love and you'll work super fucking hard all the time with no separation or any boundaries. And also take everything extremely personal. So I know that you do that because I do that. I used to do that, I still do it, I try to not do it, but it's personal because we love our business, we love what we do, we make it personal. But please, please, please take it from me. Silence does not mean disinterest, it usually just means timing. And if you need to do this, then just take a piece of paper, a post-it note, write this down, put it on your, I don't know, forehead note that you can then you can't see it only when you look in a mirror. I like that kind of uh yeah, reflective thing. Never mind. Put it on your computer, write it in your bullet journal, but make sure that you don't forget it. Silence does not mean disinterest, it usually means timing or just life. Life, life lifing for people. Like people have their life lifing a lot, like, especially nowadays. So, what we're gonna do is we're gonna reframe the whole thing, like look at it differently. We are not gonna look at posts singular, we're gonna look at the whole thing as campaigns. Now, I know a campaign like a marketing campaign might sound very overwhelming. What it essentially is, is basically just wrapping your present, your message in all kinds of different ways, wrapping it differently, and they're gifts. You're giving the gifts of information to those people that might need your information or might want your information, because I know you're thinking they don't actually need new yarn or need a new pattern, but want uh also counts, so you're wrapping the gifts differently, and if it helps call it a mini campaign, just add mini to it and it's less overwhelming. I mean, it works for me. So you'll have one idea, one message, and you repeat it over time in different forms. Marketing is that repetition of all of that, the repetition of doing different things to help your audience, your clients understand what you have to offer. Let's go back to that wedding, thinking about all those different gifts. During the day, the whole wedding party gets small gifts, and the gifts all communicate the same message. These two people that are getting married love each other and they want to share that. I'm just making this up. This is actually a really good idea. Perhaps people do this all the time. I got married once, I had a small wedding, I don't know, but my idea that's coming up is like this message of we love each other, but we also love animals, and so we want to support this animal shelter, and they wrap this message in different ways. So on the menu, there's a QR code, they will give small presents of thank you, which will be little fluffy, what's the word, cuddly toys that are little dogs, and they gift that to you when you leave the party. They will talk about it in in their speech. They will have a couple of I don't know what what we do, what is animal-friendly. There will be um two dogs coming in and um um showing their cuteness. I don't know if that's a really bad idea. Anyway, you get my point. At the end of this party, and even a week later, when they sent an email to thank you for coming and also talking again about this animal shelter that they want to support. Uh, and by the way, they also put that in the invitation. We don't want gifts, we want you to support this animal shelter. Um, and so that is four or five different ways that they repeat this message over time in different packaging. So let me just go back to the numbers with some more context. Numbers actually can really calm your nervous system. That might sound a little unnatural to you, but if you know something, you don't have to worry about it anymore. I guess that's the best way of looking at it. So um take this for me. I did the research, and I give you permission, it's okay, to really, really feel this. Something that you want to share needs to show up seven to ten times before people really recognize it. That's the rule of seven. Fifteen to twenty times before it starts to feel familiar. Are you listening to these numbers? Fifteen to twenty times. And this is this matches what we know about the mere exposure effect that I was talking about before, where familiarity keeps increasing with repetition, and more than 30 times before you start feeling bored of it. Okay, let that sink in. More than 30 times before you start feeling bored of it. Okay, now I know you're gonna say something here because one of the people in my business circle did. They said, because I asked them, do you feel bored when people do you feel like people are repeating their messages often? And the general reaction was no, not really, except when there's a sale. And then I of course asked, Do you feel bored? And then one of them said, Yes, actually I do. And I want to be like fully like this, could also happen, this could be the case, but then look at how they package the message. That might have been a little bit more creative, that might have been done differently across different platforms, like not 30 messages on Instagram, like across your different platforms. Just really think that through. And if you take away from this, the lowest number I set was seven, the largest was 30 plus. I know that you're not gonna do 30 plus messages about something, and that's okay. You don't have to do that. I fully get that. I would not do that, but look at it this way. Think about it this way it will only get boring if you make a mini campaign that is between seven to two times, or let's say seven to fifteen times when you bring out that message. And you do it creatively, it will not feel boring to the people that are interested because you are actually communicating to those that are interested. People that don't care. That's not your people. So you don't need to worry about that. Okay, moving on. So there's no actual single magic number. There's a pattern. There's not a like a perfect formula. Um but the pattern is clear. Once is almost never enough. And there we hit the next thing, which is the kind what I want to call the boredom paradox. And especially if you are someone who needs to be entertained a lot, let's just call it that. Um this is important. So when you feel bored of your message, someone else is often hearing it for the first time. So you need to be strong. You need to be strong and go back to these numbers. Go back to what you know rather than what you feel. It's hard. I know it's hard, but you can do it. You live inside your business. Things get old for you quickly, and especially if you have ADHD, you're bored of the thing that you made. Like, say you're dying yarn, you're born up almost bored of the color before it's even on your on in your web shop. That's just what happens to some people. And it part of running your business is to embrace that is happening and to hold on to knowing, not feeling, knowing that you still need to repeat the message. And I am learning that every day still. I love building new things. I love really listening to what people need now in the moment. And I already have the course, so I'm gonna do something else. So I need to really learn and practice this as well. When you are getting bored of your own message, it's not really a warning sign, it's more of it's finally getting enough airtime. So you actually should look for that feeling of boredom within yourself. That's a good sign. I know that's why we call it a paradox. The uncomfortable part of it has to do with the feeling that you're bragging or you're pushing or you're being salesy or you're taking up too much space, and this is all very uncomfortable to you. I hear you. And especially if you're a sensitive person, if you're values-driven, if you're allergic to marketing noise, and I'm positive that if not all three of those things, there's definitely one thing that really rings true to you. But when you're honest, repetition isn't salesy. When you're honest, transparent, in integrity, when you are offering your audience, your clients, what they need, it's care. It's not pushy, it's you caring about them. And you happen to do this as a job. Like that's perfect. That's the perfect balance. You love doing what you do, and they need what you have to offer. I'm gonna repeat it. I'm going to repeat it. It is necessary, it is normal, it is what you're supposed to be doing. So don't copy paste, don't use one message across different channels, your newsletter, your Instagram, your Pinterest, your if you have a podcast, if you have a blog, if you talk to people, don't forget about that. That's also an important one. Don't use the exact same message. Um, you're gonna have to be creative. So going back to your mini campaign, how's that sound now? Are you are you feeling what's your body telling you? If I say mini campaign, are you still getting overwhelmed or is it starting to feel a little bit more calm? And it's okay. I can do this step by step. I'm here. I'm here to I'm here to hold your hand. So listen up. What you can do, different types of messaging around the same topic. So you'll probably have to take your bullet journal or other journal or or or word document and start writing. Have a topic. You can have a story around the topic, a mistake that you've made on the topic, a client that had an experience like I'm sharing with you now about my business circle, peeps. Um, a question that you might have, like an honest question, a reflection, something that came to you like like this really hit me like a few hours after what we talked when we worked with the business circle. I was like, wait, just one time? And you can also do behind the scenes type things. Um, the same message, just different ways of repping it. Same message, different ways of repping it over different platforms. Then you can easily see that even knowing that let's say you're using four platforms, um, and that's also, by the way, also a really good sign that if you're just using Instagram, probably not enough, uh, probably better off spending less time on one platform and spreading that time over multiple platforms and ways, rooms, so to speak. You're not spamming, you are, let's say, two messages over, let's say uh a week, even a week. No, a week. I feel I'm gonna make you feel overwhelmed. So let's say you have four platforms you want to use to spread your message orally, just people you meet in markets, festivals, places, your shop, whatever, on phone, your email, newsletter, Instagram, and Pinterest. Just picking four. This really shows you that if you just have Instagram, that's probably not enough. It's probably a better idea to spend less time in one room and spread it across more rooms so that more people can hear it and they feel the repetition. And say that you will have a mini campaign, two messages across all those rooms. That's eight messages, but they're only repeated twice in each room. Can you see how if you want to do, if you want to really get to the 20, that you can it spreads out so it doesn't feel like you're constantly sharing the same thing to the same people because you're repping it differently and you're coming from different angles, different rooms, different platforms. So people don't magically connect the dots, you connect the dots for them. It's not spamming, it's really not spamming, and it asks something of your creativity, which is great because I know you are creative and you can do this. It's spending your time differently and doing the work of thinking around about the topics in different ways, that is going to be a little bit different than what you've been used to, probably. So I want to invite you to think this. If you shared something just once and decided, well, that didn't work, revisit it, do it again in a different package over multiple platforms. Repeat. Clarity is built over time, and people arrive at it at different moments. They're not always ready to get the information in the moment that it is served to them, if it is served to them at all. So you're not failing, you just post it once, and it needed multiple moments. It's not a flaw. You didn't do anything wrong, you just need to repeat it. That's it. Thank you for listening. I hope this sparked something for you. Process it. I'm giving you permission to repeat things. It's okay, don't feel bad. And let me know what you think. Email me at info at yeah-vol.com. I would love to hear what you think and talk to you about it. And if you want to do similar work with a group, we can do that in the business circle. Go to patentshift.fm to find out more. And if you have any questions, you know where to find me. Okay, go repeat.