#113 - The honest truth about what's waiting on the other side of that free call button

You’ve seen the button. “Book a free discovery call.” And something about it feels a little prickly — like clicking it means you’re walking into a lion’s den with no way out. I used to feel exactly the same way. Now I’m on the other side of it, and I want to invite you in properly.

In this short episode I walk through what a discovery call actually is — and what it isn’t. It’s not a sales pitch. It’s not a test you can fail. It’s not a free coaching session. And you won’t leave owing me anything.

What it is: a 30-minute real conversation. We figure out where you are, what might help, and whether we’re a match. It goes both ways — I’m figuring out if I can help you, and you’re figuring out if I’m the right person to do that.

I also talk about the question I always ask: are you in building mode or survival mode? And I explain the difference between coaching and therapy — including why there’s still space for real emotions in coaching, just not trauma work.

If you’re curious, that’s already enough reason to book. You don’t need a plan. You don’t need to prepare. Just show up.

Transcript

Why Free Calls Feel Suspicious

Speaker 2 0:00

On a lot of websites from coaches or other therapists you might have seen, book a free call or book a discovery call and you're not really sure what's on the other side of it. Well, today I'm gonna take you with me and, clue you in, tell you about the discovery call, about what my discovery calls look like, and so you know what to expect when you book that free session.

Saskia 0:27

Hey, and welcome to Pattern Shift. I'm Saskia a creative life and business coach for fiber loving makers, teachers, designers, shop owners, and all around creatives. I help you way find your next step, organize your business to fit your life, and launch ideas with joyful action. Together we'll untangle the tricky bits like branding, marketing, and sales, and build something sustainable, soulful, and truly. You.

What A Discovery Call Is Not

Coaching Versus Therapy Explained

Speaker 0:57

Hi. So today we've got a short one. we are talking about the discovery call. The discovery call is something we often see in coaching, and I think it's time to let you know what it actually is.'cause a lot of the time we, I used to feel a little bit. Uncomfortable.'cause it felt like I was lured into the lion's den. and I would inevitably have to buy something and. And so I think it's time we talk about it because now I am on the other side of it and I really want to welcome you in and, have you sit at my table and perhaps it's best to look at it as, rather the Mad Hatters, tea Party, than a lion's den. I want to talk about it because I get questions and I see people hesitate, because they dunno what to expect. And I also wanna talk about. what it is, what it isn't, so that you have an idea and that you step into it, whether that is one of my discovery calls or another person's discovery call, just knowing, what you can expect. And of course, I can only talk about my own practice, but it'll give you a little bit of a better idea of what's going on. So let's start with what a discovery call is not. So, it's definitely not a sales pitch where I try to convince you of anything. in fact, it's almost the opposite of a sales call, I'm not selling you anything. In that moment as discovery call is exactly what it is, it's to discover, It's not a test you can fill. I am not looking to see, what you know about business, how creative you are, if you are, I don't know, failing at something. No, it's none of that. And this is really important, not a therapy session. Like coaching is not therapy. So, that's very important to know The difference between therapy and coaching. Coaching focuses on the now and in my practice especially, we focus on joyful moving forwards, taking small steps to get, forward in life and business. And we're not focusing on the past. We're not, Solving any trauma, we are building joyfully. Okay. Another thing that a discovery call is not, is that, it's not a free coaching call. There are aspects of coaching in there. The, the way I might ask a question, could look a lot like, a question I might ask in a coaching call, but it's not a free coaching call. It's also usually just 30 minutes. It is also not an obligation. when we leave the call, you don't leave owing me anything. So it's 30 minutes of a real conversation. There is no agenda there beyond figuring out where you are. And who you are. And if we are a match, if we are, able to work with each other. And it's a two-way thing. I'm figuring out if I can help you and you are figuring out if I'm the right person to do so. So when we have this. 30 minute conversation, you will always leave with something useful. Even if we don't work together. You'll figure out whether coaching in general might be something for you if we, might be able to work together in a good way. and sometimes, although it's not a full coaching session, sometimes we really get to stuff by just exploring, what's going on for you. And the key question I, mainly am asking in one way or another is if you are in building mode or survival mode and why that matters. I talk a lot about, as I just, hinted on before what is actually coaching in, In comparison to therapy, and if you are surviving, how could coaching help or support, other ways of, working with the things that are stuck. So sometimes, um, and today actually when I was talking to a client, was a, was an exceptional, moment where at the end of the coaching session they actually reflected back to me what was happening and, came up with this wonderful way of explaining, what coaching. Is, they said it was. therapy is where you are in the shadows in working with getting out of those shadows where coaching is, you are in the lights, you're in a playful, safe environment where you can explore. I loved how they explained that. And that is actually, yeah, that's what's happening. if you're in survival mode, it might actually be a really good, time to. Have a space for yourself that's safe and where you can joyfully explore, working on building things rather than restoring. Other things in your life. and sometimes if you're really in the thick of it, coaching might not be for you at that moment. personally, I think it's two sides to a coin and they can work really well together. and it's really important to keep those boundaries. I. I'm not a trauma expert. I cannot help you with that. I am trained to do different things and I also choose to be in this light space where we can be creative and build something.

Speaker 4 7:12

Here's a short note from editing. Saskia, if you're watching on YouTube, I look exactly the same'cause I'm editing right after recording. But I noticed that one thing that I didn't mention is that within a coaching session or within a discovery call, there is a lot of space for emotions. It's not that we cannot have negative emotions, not at all. There's space for that. Um, we do not work on trauma. That's a big difference.

Building Mode Or Survival Mode

Who The Call Is For

How To Book And Show Up

Safety, Confidentiality, And Next Steps

Speaker 7:41

So if you come back to that question, are you in building mode or survival mode? And your answer is, I'm in building mode, then coaching is the perfect space for you. Of course, even if you know what you're gonna build and you're almost there, but there's something like not really clear yet in coaching, you can really use the space to get her with the coach to work through that and figure out what's not completely in place yet. So building mode or survival mode. Both are, um, you're set up to do some coaching unless you are thoroughly, thoroughly in the thick of it and basically need therapy more than anything. But in this, um, in this discovery call, we will talk about that and I will always be honest and clear to you and answer any questions you might have around that. Now who is the discovery call for? So let's say you have something, a practice, a craft, a business idea, and you're not really sure what your next step is. You've been. Thinking about coaching, but you don't really know what coaching even does. What are differences between coaching and you're curious but not ready to commit to anything yet. All that is fine. That's exactly what this is for. If you feel like you just have some questions around it, but you don't have any budget or you just, you're just curious, it's fine. That's what it's for. I will always. Also get something out of the session. So you are never wasting my time, if that's what you're thinking. Like, um, I really wanna do a discovery session, but I actually already know that I don't wanna do coaching. That's okay. You are not wasting my time'cause I always learn something and I can just give you the answers that you need. And perhaps at some point you are ready for it and then you already know what kind of to expect. And I would love to give you that information. So, please don't hold back. I have time in my calendar to do these calls. So don't worry about me. what I'm saying, who is this for? I'm not talking about who, who is coaching for, I'm talking about who is the discovery call for? Um. Basically the answer is very simple. If you're curious either about what coaching with me is like, what coaching in general is, if it's something that could be helpful for you, yeah, it then please by all means, set up a date in my calendar and let's talk. And then the next thing is how to prepare. You don't really need to prepare'cause I know what questions to ask to get you to the point where you need to be. So all you need to do is set up a date in my calendar with the link that is provided on my website and in the show notes. And wherever you try to find me, you'll find a link to. book a date and it goes specifically to the discovery call. calendar. So, don't worry about that either. So there's absolutely no preparation. The only thing is please show up if you do make an appointment.'cause I really, um. Open up this time in my calendar specifically to do this. And it mean for me, it means that I, I have to be in working mode, so that means that I'm in my office and, I don't have any dogs around or kids or other things going on. And, I don't have a lot of that kind of time. As I said before, you're never wasting my time, but please show up to the appointment. That is one thing that I do ask of you. So you don't need a plan, you don't need a pitch, you don't need to, sell yourself to me. just roughly where you are and what's feeling stuck or unclear. And if you have no idea, there's just a sense of something is not working and I don't know what, it's fine, we'll figure it out together. So in the show notes, as I said before, you can find the link to book a discovery session. If you're not sure if it's the right moment right now, that's actually a sign that you really should have the call. I would love to talk to you. I would love to get to know you. I would love to answer some of your questions. it's, it's a safe, it's literally a safe space. We also like to call it a brave space, where you can be open and honest and everything you share with me. Is only going to, stay with me. I am not gonna share that with any other people. I am, not allowed to and I don't want to. So, I have, very clear rules and regulations about this and this actually also, one of the things that I talk about in the discovery call is. What coaching with me looks like, what are some of those, value systems that, and, and rules And things that I do to make sure that you feel safe so that you can be brave. please send me a note if you have any more questions around the topic. But you know what, if you have a question, you might as well book the call right? Okay, so whenever you feel like someone is trying to sell you something with a discovery call, I hope I've helped you understand that, a discovery call is not trying to sell you something, at least not if it comes to my discovery calls. I'm not trying to sell you something. my focus is always on helping people and, and if I help people, we have, an exchange of value and, that. In the end means that at some point you might pay me some money to do some more of this work, but I'm not actively selling my coaching in the discovery column. Just we're just figuring out whether or not this is a good idea for you in this time. All right. Thank you so much for this. I hope this was clear, and if not, you know where to find me. Get to the link in the show notes and book a call. Bye.

Speaker 5 14:24

I want to be transparent about A how AI fits into my work. I use it to organize, not to create. That distinction matters to me, and it's when I talk about openly in episode 112. If you want the full story, the ideas are mine, the words are mine. AI helps me to sort and structure what's already there.